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It never seizes to amaze me how clever marketing is able to dupe even the usually cynical, educated demographic. I came to work today to find a nearly empty bottle of water sitting at the workstation. The contents of this bottle had been consumed by my colleague who would be shortly signing out to me. This colleague happens to be a highly intelligent woman with post doctoral education, great personality and what I would consider flawless skin.
Now to the bottle of water - what caught your eye immediately was the name: "BORBA" SKIN BALANCE WATER in Ariel 32 font, an appealing light gray on white background. Things get better from here. An image of exotic Lychee fruit tastefully decorated the front followed by this information: REPLENISHING, Designed to diminish skin's Dryness.Sensitivity.Roughness.....HIGH IN ANTIOXDANT VITAMIN C & E, ZERO CALORIES.
And wait, there is more on the back (this is worth the read)
BORBA
Nutraceuticles (don't know what the hell that is, but sure sounds impressive)
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HEALTHY SKIN FROM WITHINTM
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BORBA SKIN BALANCE WATER REPLENISHIG contains a revolutionary cultivated bio-vitamin complex along with nutrients from the lychee fruit, which are intended to boost moisture, keeping skin smooth and supple while aiding in its hydration. BORBA SKIN BALANCE WATER is formulated to work with your body's chemistry to promote healthy skin. This on-the-go skin care infused beverage combines simplicity and nutrition with the goodness of water. Its water with benefits. (are you thinking what I am thinking)
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the next section goes on to elaborate on the miracle of Lychee fruit, I will not bother to reproduce it, but what follows is important in case you forgot how to consume water:
DIRECTIONS FOR USE: Shake well, Twist, Sip, Thrive. Enjoy cold. Drink BORBA Skin Balance Daily to enhance skin care from within. (I think this is an obvious typo, since I would urge the prospective imbiber to drink my concoction three times a day instead of Daily)
And this goes on and on..... as long as you don't look closely at the ingredients that for some inexplicable reason include dyes like FDC yellow etc and sucralose - I guess you have to balance all that goodness with a touch of poison.
icing on the cake? The miracle water's inventor is:
SCOTT-VINCENT BORBA,
Founder and Licensed Esthetician
I suspect Mr Borba after a series of highly successful careers as a used car salesman, bail-bondsman and investment banker with GS has now reached the pinnacle with his new venture.
It never seizes to amaze me how clever marketing is able to dupe even the usually cynical, educated demographic. I came to work today to find a nearly empty bottle of water sitting at the workstation. The contents of this bottle had been consumed by my colleague who would be shortly signing out to me. This colleague happens to be a highly intelligent woman with post doctoral education, great personality and what I would consider flawless skin.
Now to the bottle of water - what caught your eye immediately was the name: "BORBA" SKIN BALANCE WATER in Ariel 32 font, an appealing light gray on white background. Things get better from here. An image of exotic Lychee fruit tastefully decorated the front followed by this information: REPLENISHING, Designed to diminish skin's Dryness.Sensitivity.Roughness.....HIGH IN ANTIOXDANT VITAMIN C & E, ZERO CALORIES.
And wait, there is more on the back (this is worth the read)
BORBA
Nutraceuticles (don't know what the hell that is, but sure sounds impressive)
__________________________________
HEALTHY SKIN FROM WITHINTM
_________________________________________________________
BORBA SKIN BALANCE WATER REPLENISHIG contains a revolutionary cultivated bio-vitamin complex along with nutrients from the lychee fruit, which are intended to boost moisture, keeping skin smooth and supple while aiding in its hydration. BORBA SKIN BALANCE WATER is formulated to work with your body's chemistry to promote healthy skin. This on-the-go skin care infused beverage combines simplicity and nutrition with the goodness of water. Its water with benefits. (are you thinking what I am thinking)
__________________________________________
the next section goes on to elaborate on the miracle of Lychee fruit, I will not bother to reproduce it, but what follows is important in case you forgot how to consume water:
DIRECTIONS FOR USE: Shake well, Twist, Sip, Thrive. Enjoy cold. Drink BORBA Skin Balance Daily to enhance skin care from within. (I think this is an obvious typo, since I would urge the prospective imbiber to drink my concoction three times a day instead of Daily)
And this goes on and on..... as long as you don't look closely at the ingredients that for some inexplicable reason include dyes like FDC yellow etc and sucralose - I guess you have to balance all that goodness with a touch of poison.
icing on the cake? The miracle water's inventor is:
SCOTT-VINCENT BORBA,
Founder and Licensed Esthetician
I suspect Mr Borba after a series of highly successful careers as a used car salesman, bail-bondsman and investment banker with GS has now reached the pinnacle with his new venture.
1 comment:
that water actually tastes really good though.
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